BEASTIES

Mosquitoes, unlike French farmers, are still partial to a bit of fresh British meat and no doubt they’ll be pleased to m-eat you. On Kefalonia there isn’t a particular problem with mosquitoes but they do exist and they seem to be attracted to some people more than others.

If you know you’re a mozzie magnet see your local GP before your holiday, otherwise there are various preventative potions, including Deet and Autan. The Greeks use vinegar so, if you don’t mind smelling like a chip shop on a Friday night, that’s an inexpensive option. (Greek vinegar, by the way, is balsamic rather than malt). If you haven’t got a mozzie machine you can get one from the local grocery shops, also refills when needed. These plug in to the mains electric supply in your room and emit a vapour disliked by mozzies. Change the tablet nightly before you plug it in and it acts as a deterrent (don’t forget to unplug it during the day while you’re out!). Alternatively, you can buy plug-in mozzie repellent in liquid form; this might last the whole holiday. A few years ago I was working on Spetses with a young Swedish rep – lithe long legs, blond hair and blue eyes… ...his name was Sven. Oh well! No, actually her name was Maria and she was a very nice girl so I’m sure this is true: Maria advised her guests, at her Welcome Meeting, to buy a mozzie machine. A few days later one of her guests came to see her. He had followed her advice and bought a mozzie machine but was covered in big red bites. Like most Swedes he spoke English reasonably well, but he couldn’t read English. There was only one word he recognised… ...so he ate the tablet. Don’t keep taking the tablets !!

Jellyfish exist in Greek waters as they do around the UK, but they are rarely a big problem. I have seen some around Kefalonia early in the season, but not frequently. The clear ones are harmless, ones with coloured (e.g. purple) veins sting. A traditional 'relief' is to pee on the wound (but you may have to be a contortionist); ammonia sticks are availably in grocery shops and work reasonably well. Otherwise consult a pharmacist, or a doctor if it's particularly painful.

Sea urchins look something like baby hedgehogs and live on the sea bed – usually, but not always, in rocky areas. When dead and devoid of spikes the shells are rather attractive and surprisingly fragile, hence the spines. These protect live sea urchins and they can be extremely painful if you stand on one. You may be able to squeeze the spine out after soaking with olive oil but it's probably best to seek medical advice. Now for a surprise: you may see a fisherman eating ‘sea urchin salad’ - a delicacy. At one time Kefalonia had a bit of a reputation for sea urchin salad. Snakes and such things (herpetology) – see Snake Festival.

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